Hypomania

Hypomania is definitely a sore subject for me. Other than full out depression, Hypomania is the part of Bipolar disorder that gives me the most fits.  At any given time, you can fall into Hypomania and your whole world seems to come undone.  

A simple definition of Hypomania is a mood state where you are partially manic and partially depressed. It is also called a mixed-state.  The feeling you get from it can vary, but my experience with Hypomania is a mix of high energy and agitation at the same time. I become paranoid and nervous, and though I have lots of energy I feel overwhelmed by everything that happens to me.  Working is very hard when you are hypomanic, as every job you try to do seems insurmountable, and dealing with co-workers can be very difficult. I find it hard to hold down a conversation when my mind is racing and every sentence takes effort to say.  Needless to say, Hypomania makes it difficult to have friendships because most of the time when you are going through it, you can’t be there for the other person due to your own agitation and overwhelming mood.  

Just as with Mania or Depression, Hypomanic states can be very dangerous especially if they go on for long periods of time. They can hurt your work performance, force you to procrastinate, and damage friendships or relationships.  The good news is that they are just as temporary as the other states of Bipolar, but that doesn’t mean they are less serious. It is possible to become suicidal during a hypomanic phase because you do have that underlying depression to deal with. If you notice yourself or your loved one going through these states frequently, then it is important to talk to your doctor about modifying your medication. The bad news is though that there will still be hypomanic episodes even with a good regimen of drugs. You just have to minimize the damage. Force yourself to stay on top of your work. Tell your friends that you are sorry you're not attentive, but you will catch up with them when you feel better.  Treat a hypomanic phase just as you would a more severe mood swing and find the ways you need to use to cope and get through them.  They will subside.

Dealing with Bipolar Depression

The hardest part for most Bipolar patients is handling the depressive moods or what I like to refer to as the “down days”.  Mania, though hard to handle, is so much more fun than those days when you crash hard and feel like you don’t want to do anything but stay in bed.  These tips can help you battle depression and at least tolerate this aspect of your moods:

1. Ride it out. - Recognizing that you are going through a depression is half the battle. I find that it is somewhat helpful to deal with a depression when you recognize that it is not a permanent experience.  The depression will end if you can make it through it unscather. Our minds are built to correct the feeling of depression so even if you feel that your depression is at the top of its game, it will slowly get better. Focus on recognizing the depression, owning it, and realizing that it is temporary and you are going to eventually get better.

2. Fight the urge to give up - Though you feel like staying in bed all day and missing work, try to fight the urge to give into these feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness.  Try to keep your regular schedule and focus on doing (despite the way you feel.)  Your depression wants you to give up and stay sedentary, but you might find if you battle against the urge to give up, you will decrease the duration of the depression. You may be miserable throughout, but allowing yourself to ignore your coping skills and dropout of society is only going to  prolong the event.

3. Don’t listen to the negative thoughts in your mind - Your mind is going to work hard to rationalize your feelings of depression.  As human beings we are designed to give reason to our emotions and try to make them better or explainable in our minds.  Depression is very good at telling you that the feelings you have are grounded in real life and your world.  Recognize that your mind is going through a depression and try to discount the connection between how you are feeling and the truth in your life. It sometimes helps to make a list of the “truths” in your life and referring to these when depression strikes. Your mind will try hard to make you paranoid, suicidal, or worried.  Feelings are just feelings. They are not true just because you feel bad and depressed. Concentrate on the fact that you are going through something that will pass.

4. Reach out to a loved one - So often with depression we feel like a bother when it comes to other people. No one wants to be a downer to those around us. Still, it is important for someone to love to know that you are going through a depression. They won’t always know how to help you, but telling them will help them to recognize any thoughts of suicide or paranoia.  Give your loved ones the help they need by learning to recognize your moods, even if you feel like withdrawing and hiding. Odds are good they already know you are depressed.

5. Don’t self medicate - It would be so nice if there was a magic pill that ended your depression, but most of the methods we use to self-medicate typically make us more depressed. Fight the urge to change the amount of pills that are prescribed to you or drinking alcohol when you are depressed. Most of the pills and alcohol you consume are depressants and will usually draw you deeper and lower in your mood.  It may be painful and you just want to escape, but that escape usually comes with a price.  Try to remember that you want the depression to subside and that it will. Don’t let self-medication give you a problem that will still exist when you finish this mood.

6. Take Breaks - When you are depressed you need to take breaks and comfort yourself. It is horrible and sometimes we try to push past our limits. It is good to give yourself space and time to make it through the episode.  Remember to keep your stress at a minimum and allow yourself to recover at a pace that works for you.

7. Consult your psychiatrist - Sometimes a depressive episode is caused by failures in your medication.  This may be a sign that you need to change mood stabilizers and/or your depression medication. These drugs sometimes stop working and it is important to let your doctor know when they are happen frequently and the duration and intensity of the depression.

The best advice I can give, and what has helped me, is the knowledge that you have a disorder that causes these depressions. They will pass, but you can try to minimize the damage created by them by acknowledging your depression and committing to the idea that they are a normal part of your disorder. You will survive them, so try not to lose hope when you feel this way.  Whatever you are feeling today, will be better tomorrow, no matter how hopeless you feel.

Welcome to the Bipolar Roller Coaster.

Do you feel like your moods are never stable always going from high to low?

Do you experience long periods of happiness and euphoria and then fall into a deep depression?
Are you always perplexed about how you will feel from day to day and do those around you notice that you are soaring high or falling deep?

Welcome to the Bipolar Roller Coaster

Having a diagnosis of Bipolar disorder can either come as a relief or an unwelcome surprise for you or a loved one.  The sound of it seems foreign or even scary, and from the name you feel as if it is some sort of odd medical term that is hard to grasp.  When you stop and think about it, learn the various symptoms, and find out more about the disease, you will probably be surprised you weren't diagnosed earlier. 

Bipolar disorder comes in two varieties, Bipolar I and Bipolar II. The disorder is also referred to sometimes as Manic Depression.  The symptoms for the various forms of Bipolar are slightly different and which Bipolar disorder you have is primarily diagnosed by duration or severity of moods.  Click Here to learn the difference between the two forms of Bipolar  as well as more about the variety of symptoms.

Whichever form of the disorder you have will determine the course of treatment that you will be prescribed, but it is very important to remember that this disease is very manageable and treatable. The challenges of having Bipolar will never go away, but you can have a successful life with the disease, it is just important to learn how to live with it and how to manage.  Your  doctor will most likely prescribe medications for the disorder, which may take time to calibrate to your needs. Don't give up hope. You will eventually find the right combination. It is very important to make it to all of your appointments especially until you get the meds correct.  Even while on meds though, you may still experience occasional swings in mood and behavior and so therapy and self-care can also help you to manage your disorder.  Hang in there. You can learn to manage.

My experience with Bipolar 

I was first diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder eight years ago, but learning about the symptoms I feel that I went undiagnosed for a majority of my adult life.  I probably began showing symptoms when I was in college, but it took a while for me to seek professional help for my long depressive episodes and my manic behavior.  I have Bipolar Disorder II with rapid cycling.  I currently take medication to keep my mood stabilized and I attend therapy to make sure that I am able to deal with the occasional mood elevations or depression.  After my diagnosis it took several years for me to finally grasp the seriousness of the disorder and to understand the value of taking my meds and managing my moods. Bipolar patients are notorious for not taking their medications and I was no different. I spent the first seven years of my diagnosis going on and off my meds, in and out of therapy, and never really working on management.  It took a close brush with suicide, a hospitalization, and major life changes before I realized the seriousness of the disorder, and began working to make my life better and manage my mental illness.  I will admit that I enjoyed the manic phases even though I knew that they would be followed by long depressions. I went through phases of high productivity and phases of crippling depression and basically rode this roller coaster every day, not knowing what mood I would wake up tomorrow experiencing.  The surprising thing, I later learned, is that those people around me definitely recognized my symptoms long before I did, and it has been with their help that I have learned the most about managing my disorder.  I have been very fortunate to have understanding people in my life, good doctors, and a supportive family.  Though there is no cure for the disorder, I learned that I could manage it, and that I didn't have to stay on the roller coaster every day.

Learning to Help Others

As I began becoming more accepting of my disorder and learning to share it with people, I was surprised how many of my friends and co-workers have dealt with Bipolar, or other mental illness in their own lives or in the lives of their loved ones.  Mental illness is often stigmatized and treated differently than other health issues, but I have learned that it is really not beneficial for me to hide my disorder, but rather accept it and embrace that I am managing every day.  It may not be something that all Bipolar sufferers are comfortable discussing, but I have found that it is in my nature to share, and that through sharing I have been given many opportunities to help others to understand the disorder and find comfort.  I decided to start this blog to help those out there that may be suffering from the disorder, or who might have loved ones who are suffering.  It is my goal to provide information and resources as well as inspiration for those who are faced with this challenge every day.  So, welcome to the roller-coaster that is Bipolar disorder. Know that you are not alone, Bipolar disorder affects approximately 5.7 million adult Americans, or about 2.6% of the U.S. population age 18 and older every year. (National Institute of Mental Health),  You and your loved one can learn to manage the disease and to have a productive and happy life.

*I am not a certified physician or therapist. I am a normal person who manages his life with Bipolar Disorder every day. My goal is to share my experiences to help those who also manage their Bipolar or live with someone who is managing.